When I’m with my fiancé, I feel like I’m normal. He does not question me when I say I can’t handle certain things or touch certain objects. He does not think I’m lazy or that I’m just not trying hard enough. He accepts me as me, with all that it entails. It’s a strange, strange feeling.
We first met at a party trough a friend of mine. They had known each other for years and I had been living some 800 kilometres away, so it wasn’t really strange, the “never met”-part. It was definitely a “What? I do that too!”-thing, only stronger. We discussed silly details, like how you move troops in Warcraft, and I asked questions about how he felt with people touching him. Quite normal.
I usually get very tired from hanging out with people. I need time to rest, and I prefer not to see people too often. Once or twice per week if they’re farther away than 20 minutes by bus. This screws things up with “being normal” and “having friends”. I need to know abut stuff a few days in advance so I can get myself ready. When I’m with him, I’m not tired. I don’t need any time for myself. It’s effortless. It’s like I’m alone, but I’m not. It’s like we’re just one person. I suspect it’s because we’re both aspies.
It’s been seven months now. It feels like a week at the most. It feels like we’ve known each other forever. It feels like I’m normal.
It’s a lovely feeling.